I couldn’t care less about basketball, and my general approach to sports-spectation is that if I’m going to watch something, it’ll be the professionals.(1) So March Madness holds zero sway over yours truly.
This is a whole different ball game.(2)
If you’ve read more than three posts here, you know I’m a fan of Star Wars.(3) And being a nerd, I find brackets very appealing. I always wanted to get into March Madness just so I could fill out a bracket. Now I don’t have to watch any stupid basketball to do it! It’s a win-win!
The This Is Madness bracket will essentially break down into a popularity contest, rather than people considering how each fight would turn out. (Like, who would win in an actual fight between Leia and Padme?(4)) But no matter the particulars, I think Darth Vader would win the whole thing. He has demonstrated time and again how far he’s willing to go to win a duel, including my favorite Darth Vader moment of all time:
In a duel with a cloned/reanimated Darth Maul,(5) Vader stabs his lightsaber through his own torso to kill Darth Maul. Holy shit. That’s hardcore. I’m not saying this is the smartest way to win, I’m just saying that this is why Vader would win.
So that’s my take. If Vader doesn’t win, someone deserves to be Force-choked, is all I’m sayin’.
- There are people, members of my own family, who insist that college sports are more exciting because they’re out there trying to prove something. Maybe. But I personally don’t care to watch people who might one day be good enough to play professionally. It’d be like watching people who can dodge balls but not wrenches.
- Bah-dum chii!
- And seriously, if you’ve read three posts: thank you. You’re among the few who can stomach that much doggrel and live.
- All the dudes on the sidelines watching, obviously.
- I can’t remember which he is, or if he’s both, in the comic.