bang on zee drum all day

Ever since half my band moved away last August I’ve been trying to find some new cool kids to rock with. Tragically about the only resource available to me is Craigslist and, like all things Craigslist, the results fall just about evenly on a scale somewhere between potentially awesome and getting murdered.

So far I’ve met one guy who likes to play bass as though it’s a lead guitar. There was another guy who has a ton of gear and plays a hard-on-inducing Hammond organ but mostly just wants people he can tell stories to.[1] There was this group of dude who insisted – insisted – that if you don’t play a five-string bass don’t even bother emailing them because you just wouldn’t fit in and then I went ahead and emailed them anyway, musician-to-musician, from a place of honest curiosity, to ask what it was about their music that required that fifth string only for them to re-post on Craigslist that you shouldn’t even bother to email them about why they need a five-string-bass-player because if you don’t know you’ll just never get it.

Clearly I had to make fun of these assholes. And I did. They flagged my post and got it removed.

Otherwise I’ve met a bunch of musicians who waffle like Brett Favre at Denny’s. They say they want this but they really want that. They say they’re getting together in a week and you never hear from them again. They say they’re painting their studio but the painting process drags on for months. Their drummer is out of town.

Gack.

Last week, though, I talked to a dude, first by email and then on the phone, who seems a bit more solid in what he wants to do. He’s trying to put something together and though I’m a bit unclear as to what he wants, I do know that he wants to try something that you don’t hear on the radio all the time. Even though this likely means he’ll reject my idea of being an ABBA tribute band, I’m intrigued.

But the most important part, the reason I’m really excited, is that I’m going to audition to play drums.

Pretty much anything you’d need to play in a rock band I can cover all by me onesee.[2] But not at the same time, for what should be obvious reasons. I love playing guitar and piano and really everything I can play. But I have a strong affinity for being a drummer.[3] Drumming is just fun. I’ve often thought that if I were a drummer in a rock band I would be the calmest dude ever outside of the band. I find it somewhat therapeutic to beat the crap out of something in a set tempo and rhythm. And drumming is about the only socially acceptable way to do this on a regular basis.

So tonight I’ll audition to be a drummer. I’m ridiculously excited about it.


[1] This guy was more of a collector of music than a creator of said.
[2] Pirate-speak for ‘by myself.’
[3] But I don’t own a drumset and don’t have room for one anyway. This guy does have a drumset, so…
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