saturday things, vol. 5: facial hair

Being a dude is rough. We get a fairly raw deal, trust-wise, and, worse, we deserve it. And we know it.

But there is one thing I love about being a dude, one thing that makes the day worth facing: the mere fact that I can grow facial hair.

While I tend toward a simple goatee or beard, the staggering amount of potential variation is awesome. Sometimes I think the cataloging of these are the internet’s raison d’être. (Remember that it was invented at a time when facial hair was much more prevalent than today’s fashion allows.)

I love the planning stage too…Hmm…I think I want to grow some type of hirsute affectation, and so but which one do I go with? Maybe I peruse the internet, pick up a magazine or two, rent a buddy-cop flick from the 70s…whatever I need in order to brainstorm-it-up.

But the actual growing and, even better, the maintenance, of the facial hair…that what I live for. You’re Michelangelo and that big damn block of marble. You can go as bushy or as streamlined as you want! Get bored? Just switch it up – maybe grow the goatee to a point! My morning is incomplete without the search for one or two Miracle-Grow hairs that I can trim with my little beard-trimming scissors.

And the hunt is never over!


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